GraceRyan
Rock n' Roll Doggie FOB
Clearly this isn't true. As this story followed the tour, I had begun to have a hard time writing real person fiction. It felt too close to reality. I wrote AU (Seconds) and loosely based fic (Please). Then U2 stopped touring and my interests moved on.
You never leave your first love and here I am. 360 is two tours and 6-7 years ago. It's easier to revisit these characters (because that's all they really are).
We left off the winter of 2011. Spider-Man: Turn off the Dark is problematic. Bono and Edge take up residence in NYC to fix their passion project. Bono has put Larry and the band ahead of his wants. He has stepped aside for Larry, but his decision haunts him. It tortures him and Gloria everyday. The thin line is brittle and close to snapping as Bono shoulders the musical and his feelings.
~~~~~~~~~~~
Gloria tapped her pen on a pile on contracts as she stared blankly at no fixed point. She truly hated contract work, but it had fallen behind while traveling around the globe. Snapping out of her daze, she opened up the calendar on her laptop. Ten days before she boarded a plane to LA. It couldn't come soon enough. She looked forward to throwing herself into a busy schedule of meetings and parties for the awards season. The prep work was tedious, but it kept her occupied. It kept her from going down to the theater to watch Bono and Edge painfully take apart their musical and put it back together again.
Last week, Julie was ‘let go’ amid anger and resentment. It was a publicity nightmare to navigate, with the constant requests for statements and interviews. However, it kept Bono tied up. To say things had been tense would be a huge understatement. The air between them crackled with electricity, as if it could erupt into a massive thunder clap at a moment's notice. They soldiered on as if they were good friends, but the want and hurt hung heavy between them. Gloria made her visits brief for everyone’s sake.
~~~~~~~~~~~
It was late, hours past dinner. Half eaten pizza with solidified cheese laid discarded in greasy cardboard delivery boxes in the recording studio. Bonoscribbled furiously on a piece of paper while Edge pushed the levels on the soundboard. Reeves chewed on a piece of crust as he waited for new words. Bono didn't even glance up when Gloria walked through the door.
“How long have you been here?” She surveyed the cups and boxes littering tabletops.
Edge grimaced. “All day. We have to release a soundtrack. Opening night is fast approaching.”
Gloria glanced to Reeves as he flipped through his phone looking thoroughly bored. “And how goes it?”
Edge nodded hesitantly. “Slowly.”
Gloria looked everywhere in the studio but him. It seemed as though he was desperately trying to avoid her as well. The shirtsleeves of his black shirt were rolled sloppily to his elbows, dozens of ginger freckles on display. Bono hated his arms. No matter how much he worked out, they never looked as smooth and chiseled as Larry’s. Hairy and speckled, they felt stubby and fleshy. Bono's scrawl became near hieroglyphics as he finished the final verses.
Gloria steeled herself to meet his gaze. His tinted glasses had been set aside, and she was never quite prepared for his piercing blue eyes. He lifted his head, and she swore she could hear the pop and fizzle between them. When was it going to get easier? When could she look at him without feeling engulfed in flames?
“Gloria.” He nodded. His voice was rough from stress and exhaustion, and perhaps sheer want.
“How's it going?” She swallowed the dry lump in her throat.
He pushed the notebook towards Edge. “I think I got it. Look it over.” But his eyes never left her. She felt drunk in like a cold glass of water on scorching day.
Edge tapped on the paper. “This line feels….clunky.”
Bono tore his eyes from Gloria to stare at the page. He chewed on his lower lip before scratching out the questionable verses with a heavy hand. His gaze swept across her and lingered before he hunched over the paper and began again. Within one minute, he pushed the pad to Edge.
“Better?”
Edge read the verses, his tapped along with the melody in his mind. He nodded and glanced from Gloria to Bono. This wasn't about a fictional superhero anymore. Perhaps it never was.
“Do you want to try it?” Edge asked.
Bono paused for a moment. He was already emotionally charged, firing on extra cylinders. He knew he should pass, call it a night and go home. However, Bono was rarely about the wise, safe decision.
“Yeah, let's hear it.” He smoothed out his paper.
Edge turned to the board and began the playback of the melody. He strummed along with music.
Reeves leaned forward with one ear tipped to Bono to hear the new words. Meanwhile Gloria clung to the wall in hopes she could disappear into the soundproofing. She knew coming tonight was a mistake. They desperately needed space, and constantly working together was just not helping matters. She couldn't very well go to Andrew and asked to be removed from the tour. She had managed to get herself a break in skipping the trip to Africa. And truthfully, Gloria had wanted to go. She had contacts in her own aid work that she had planned to meet. Before the shit hit the fan, she and Bono talked about where they would visit together. Buried deep in her laptop was a secret itinerary no one knew about. Now Gloria was headed west and Ali was taking her place.
Bono rocked back and forth as he sung the new words.
“You can change your mind
But you cannot change your heart
Your heart knows when you're hiding
Your heart knows where you are.”
He tugged at the neck of his shirt.
“I'd be myself
If I knew who I've become
You don't have to fly too high
To get too close to the sun
See the boy fall from the sky.”
Despite all his efforts, his eyes flicked up to Gloria who was motionless against the wall.
“You will always be in front of me
Even as I disappear from view
For I have done not a single thing
Without the thought of you.”
His fingers raked over his scalp like pin pricks. Her gaze felt like an anvil on his chest.
“But no, not here, not now, no way
I'm not ready to give up the fight
If I can use a single thread to cross the sky
Then why's the eye of the needle
Still your arms tonight
See how the boy falls from the sky.”
Out of the corner of his eyes, he saw Reeves smile and nod along the melody. Steve motioned for Bono to continue.
“The city conducts a symphony
I'll search through trash for a melody
That might lead us back to dignity
In this junkyard of humanity.”
“To let you go without regret
I will forever hold you always in my heart instead
Over the screams and the siren's wail
The only thing not up for sale.”
His fist curled into a ball. Hitting something, anything would feel good - just to get the anger and hurt out him. Instead, his voice soared and bounced off the walls of the small mixing room.
“Our love is like lights on a midnight train
Hurts like it's thunder with no sound of rain
Lightning splits the sky, kisses your face
Yours is the sacrifice, yours is the grace.”
His closed his eyes.
“I hear your voice inside my head
I will listen to nobody not to no one else
From the bridge where we both stood and stole the view.”
When Bono's eyes met Gloria’s, a storm exploded across her face. Pain crinkled the corners of her eyes as she gnawed on the inside of her cheek.
“I saw the you in me and the me in you
These are the threads that bind, the ones we have to weave
They will hold us true, I believe”
He had to look away because it was too much.
“I believe
Believe
Believe
Believe
Believe
Believe
Believe
Believe!”
His hands trembled so much that his knuckles had turned white from gripping the microphone too tightly.
As Edge’s last note rang like broken glass, Steve and Reeves erupted in applause and yells. Edge nodded his approval, yet he watched Gloria intently. She'd been as still as a statue. Finally, she took a deep breath and moved away from the wall.
“That was amazing.” Her shaky voice betrayed her.
“Is it too abstract?” Bono challenged.
She licked her lips and tried to look contemplative. “I think it captured the mood very well.”
“So you want me try it?” Reeves stepped forward, eagerly.
“Let me set everything up and get the guitar down,” Edge said. “You can use Bono’s vocal as a guide.”
Bono inched closer to Gloria. “Is it too much?”
She shook her head. “It's a musical. You're supposed to make the audience cry and get wound up.”
“And it does that?” His voice dropped.
“Succinctly,” she replied, barely a whisper.
If it had only been Edge in the room, Bono would have crushed his lips against hers. He'd have dropped to his knees and begged for mercy. His marriage and the band would be tossed from the top floor of the building in sacrifice for Gloria's love.
But Steve leaned against the board with Edge, and Reeves muttered Bono's new words nearby. Another technician bustled in to discuss levels.
She ran her fingers through her hair. “I have to get going.”
Bono's head snapped up. “You just got here.”
“I have a dinner meeting. Someone from PBS and BBC want to discuss a new show.” It wasn't a complete lie, but that meeting wasn't until tomorrow.
She needed to leave. The studio was small to start, but the walls were closing in around her.
Bono frowned and cleared his throat. “Thanks for stopping by to check up on us.” He didn't even try to mask his disappointment.
“We'll touch base tomorrow,” she said.
Usually a suggestive joke would spill from his mouth, but he wasn't feeling very humorous. He only nodded tightly and turned his attention to Edge and Steve.
Just turn and leave, she told herself. She hated upsetting him. Her eyes narrowed. But this was his card to play. She had to keep reminding herself that he had made this choice for them.
Gloria gathered her bag and spun to leave.
“Say hello to Larry,” Bono called, acerbically.
The iciness in his voice chilled her spine. It caught Edge's attention who glanced over. He raised an arm.
“Yeah, say hello,” he echoed, but with warmth.
“Bye,” she said, crestfallen.
Gloria hurried to the elevator and punched to down button repeatedly. Bono, being Bono, could very well run after her and cause a scene. She waited to hear footsteps or her name. Where is the fucking elevator, she wondered.
Screw it. She darted to the stairs. It didn't matter that she was 25 floors up. Her legs burned with every flight she descended. Sweat dampened her brow and soaked the back of her shirt by the time she hit the ground floor. It was then she realized that he could be waiting for her at the bottom, no sweat or huffing. She peered around the lobby and only saw the security guard. She was equally relieved, and disappointed.
With a quick wave, she pushed into the cold city night. This couldn't continue, she thought. They needed more space, more time. Ten days was too many days that the dam could break and alter everything. If possible, she would leave the tour permanently. But how would she explain it to Andrew? How would she explain it to Larry, her new boyfriend? She cared very deeply for him. She even loved him, she was certain. Even if wasn't the all consuming passion she felt for Bono. What good was emotion if it burned so deeply, so painfully?
Gloria's heart hammered as she hailed a cab and watched the city slip by. It didn't feel normal until she reached her building. She tossed a wad of cash at the driver and poured on to the sidewalk. Once again, she was disappointed to not find Bono waiting for.
Her inner sanctum offered no solace. Over a month ago, she had let him in against her better judgment. She could see him on her sofa, in her robe. She recalled him naked in her shower, in her bed. It was only one night, but her apartment felt tainted now. He had kissed her, touched her, tasted her in this space. He had lit her body on fire and smothered her skin with kisses to cool it down.
Gloria tossed her wool coat over the back of a chair. Maybe it was time to redecorate. Perhaps a renovation? Or a new place? Somewhere that old and current loves do not haunt the furniture or every corner.
She poured herself a healthy glass of red wine and sat at her tiny breakfast nook. If she'd had the energy, she would have cried. Her eyes burned from exhaustion. Opening her laptop, she pulled up her itinerary for LA. The cursor hovered over the ‘change itinerary’ link. She couldn't leave tomorrow, but perhaps the day after. With a deep breath and $500 extra dollars, she switched her flight from ten days away to two. By the time she returned from the West Coast, Bono would be on his way to Africa. With his wife by his side where she belonged.
One problem sorted. Now, did she just leave, or did she tell him?
~~~~~~
Note: I might take some liberties with style to skip ahead to the well thought out climax. I hope you enjoy this. I'll be happy to put this as the 3rd story I've completed!
Let me know your thoughts.
You never leave your first love and here I am. 360 is two tours and 6-7 years ago. It's easier to revisit these characters (because that's all they really are).
We left off the winter of 2011. Spider-Man: Turn off the Dark is problematic. Bono and Edge take up residence in NYC to fix their passion project. Bono has put Larry and the band ahead of his wants. He has stepped aside for Larry, but his decision haunts him. It tortures him and Gloria everyday. The thin line is brittle and close to snapping as Bono shoulders the musical and his feelings.
~~~~~~~~~~~
Gloria tapped her pen on a pile on contracts as she stared blankly at no fixed point. She truly hated contract work, but it had fallen behind while traveling around the globe. Snapping out of her daze, she opened up the calendar on her laptop. Ten days before she boarded a plane to LA. It couldn't come soon enough. She looked forward to throwing herself into a busy schedule of meetings and parties for the awards season. The prep work was tedious, but it kept her occupied. It kept her from going down to the theater to watch Bono and Edge painfully take apart their musical and put it back together again.
Last week, Julie was ‘let go’ amid anger and resentment. It was a publicity nightmare to navigate, with the constant requests for statements and interviews. However, it kept Bono tied up. To say things had been tense would be a huge understatement. The air between them crackled with electricity, as if it could erupt into a massive thunder clap at a moment's notice. They soldiered on as if they were good friends, but the want and hurt hung heavy between them. Gloria made her visits brief for everyone’s sake.
~~~~~~~~~~~
It was late, hours past dinner. Half eaten pizza with solidified cheese laid discarded in greasy cardboard delivery boxes in the recording studio. Bonoscribbled furiously on a piece of paper while Edge pushed the levels on the soundboard. Reeves chewed on a piece of crust as he waited for new words. Bono didn't even glance up when Gloria walked through the door.
“How long have you been here?” She surveyed the cups and boxes littering tabletops.
Edge grimaced. “All day. We have to release a soundtrack. Opening night is fast approaching.”
Gloria glanced to Reeves as he flipped through his phone looking thoroughly bored. “And how goes it?”
Edge nodded hesitantly. “Slowly.”
Gloria looked everywhere in the studio but him. It seemed as though he was desperately trying to avoid her as well. The shirtsleeves of his black shirt were rolled sloppily to his elbows, dozens of ginger freckles on display. Bono hated his arms. No matter how much he worked out, they never looked as smooth and chiseled as Larry’s. Hairy and speckled, they felt stubby and fleshy. Bono's scrawl became near hieroglyphics as he finished the final verses.
Gloria steeled herself to meet his gaze. His tinted glasses had been set aside, and she was never quite prepared for his piercing blue eyes. He lifted his head, and she swore she could hear the pop and fizzle between them. When was it going to get easier? When could she look at him without feeling engulfed in flames?
“Gloria.” He nodded. His voice was rough from stress and exhaustion, and perhaps sheer want.
“How's it going?” She swallowed the dry lump in her throat.
He pushed the notebook towards Edge. “I think I got it. Look it over.” But his eyes never left her. She felt drunk in like a cold glass of water on scorching day.
Edge tapped on the paper. “This line feels….clunky.”
Bono tore his eyes from Gloria to stare at the page. He chewed on his lower lip before scratching out the questionable verses with a heavy hand. His gaze swept across her and lingered before he hunched over the paper and began again. Within one minute, he pushed the pad to Edge.
“Better?”
Edge read the verses, his tapped along with the melody in his mind. He nodded and glanced from Gloria to Bono. This wasn't about a fictional superhero anymore. Perhaps it never was.
“Do you want to try it?” Edge asked.
Bono paused for a moment. He was already emotionally charged, firing on extra cylinders. He knew he should pass, call it a night and go home. However, Bono was rarely about the wise, safe decision.
“Yeah, let's hear it.” He smoothed out his paper.
Edge turned to the board and began the playback of the melody. He strummed along with music.
Reeves leaned forward with one ear tipped to Bono to hear the new words. Meanwhile Gloria clung to the wall in hopes she could disappear into the soundproofing. She knew coming tonight was a mistake. They desperately needed space, and constantly working together was just not helping matters. She couldn't very well go to Andrew and asked to be removed from the tour. She had managed to get herself a break in skipping the trip to Africa. And truthfully, Gloria had wanted to go. She had contacts in her own aid work that she had planned to meet. Before the shit hit the fan, she and Bono talked about where they would visit together. Buried deep in her laptop was a secret itinerary no one knew about. Now Gloria was headed west and Ali was taking her place.
Bono rocked back and forth as he sung the new words.
“You can change your mind
But you cannot change your heart
Your heart knows when you're hiding
Your heart knows where you are.”
He tugged at the neck of his shirt.
“I'd be myself
If I knew who I've become
You don't have to fly too high
To get too close to the sun
See the boy fall from the sky.”
Despite all his efforts, his eyes flicked up to Gloria who was motionless against the wall.
“You will always be in front of me
Even as I disappear from view
For I have done not a single thing
Without the thought of you.”
His fingers raked over his scalp like pin pricks. Her gaze felt like an anvil on his chest.
“But no, not here, not now, no way
I'm not ready to give up the fight
If I can use a single thread to cross the sky
Then why's the eye of the needle
Still your arms tonight
See how the boy falls from the sky.”
Out of the corner of his eyes, he saw Reeves smile and nod along the melody. Steve motioned for Bono to continue.
“The city conducts a symphony
I'll search through trash for a melody
That might lead us back to dignity
In this junkyard of humanity.”
“To let you go without regret
I will forever hold you always in my heart instead
Over the screams and the siren's wail
The only thing not up for sale.”
His fist curled into a ball. Hitting something, anything would feel good - just to get the anger and hurt out him. Instead, his voice soared and bounced off the walls of the small mixing room.
“Our love is like lights on a midnight train
Hurts like it's thunder with no sound of rain
Lightning splits the sky, kisses your face
Yours is the sacrifice, yours is the grace.”
His closed his eyes.
“I hear your voice inside my head
I will listen to nobody not to no one else
From the bridge where we both stood and stole the view.”
When Bono's eyes met Gloria’s, a storm exploded across her face. Pain crinkled the corners of her eyes as she gnawed on the inside of her cheek.
“I saw the you in me and the me in you
These are the threads that bind, the ones we have to weave
They will hold us true, I believe”
He had to look away because it was too much.
“I believe
Believe
Believe
Believe
Believe
Believe
Believe
Believe!”
His hands trembled so much that his knuckles had turned white from gripping the microphone too tightly.
As Edge’s last note rang like broken glass, Steve and Reeves erupted in applause and yells. Edge nodded his approval, yet he watched Gloria intently. She'd been as still as a statue. Finally, she took a deep breath and moved away from the wall.
“That was amazing.” Her shaky voice betrayed her.
“Is it too abstract?” Bono challenged.
She licked her lips and tried to look contemplative. “I think it captured the mood very well.”
“So you want me try it?” Reeves stepped forward, eagerly.
“Let me set everything up and get the guitar down,” Edge said. “You can use Bono’s vocal as a guide.”
Bono inched closer to Gloria. “Is it too much?”
She shook her head. “It's a musical. You're supposed to make the audience cry and get wound up.”
“And it does that?” His voice dropped.
“Succinctly,” she replied, barely a whisper.
If it had only been Edge in the room, Bono would have crushed his lips against hers. He'd have dropped to his knees and begged for mercy. His marriage and the band would be tossed from the top floor of the building in sacrifice for Gloria's love.
But Steve leaned against the board with Edge, and Reeves muttered Bono's new words nearby. Another technician bustled in to discuss levels.
She ran her fingers through her hair. “I have to get going.”
Bono's head snapped up. “You just got here.”
“I have a dinner meeting. Someone from PBS and BBC want to discuss a new show.” It wasn't a complete lie, but that meeting wasn't until tomorrow.
She needed to leave. The studio was small to start, but the walls were closing in around her.
Bono frowned and cleared his throat. “Thanks for stopping by to check up on us.” He didn't even try to mask his disappointment.
“We'll touch base tomorrow,” she said.
Usually a suggestive joke would spill from his mouth, but he wasn't feeling very humorous. He only nodded tightly and turned his attention to Edge and Steve.
Just turn and leave, she told herself. She hated upsetting him. Her eyes narrowed. But this was his card to play. She had to keep reminding herself that he had made this choice for them.
Gloria gathered her bag and spun to leave.
“Say hello to Larry,” Bono called, acerbically.
The iciness in his voice chilled her spine. It caught Edge's attention who glanced over. He raised an arm.
“Yeah, say hello,” he echoed, but with warmth.
“Bye,” she said, crestfallen.
Gloria hurried to the elevator and punched to down button repeatedly. Bono, being Bono, could very well run after her and cause a scene. She waited to hear footsteps or her name. Where is the fucking elevator, she wondered.
Screw it. She darted to the stairs. It didn't matter that she was 25 floors up. Her legs burned with every flight she descended. Sweat dampened her brow and soaked the back of her shirt by the time she hit the ground floor. It was then she realized that he could be waiting for her at the bottom, no sweat or huffing. She peered around the lobby and only saw the security guard. She was equally relieved, and disappointed.
With a quick wave, she pushed into the cold city night. This couldn't continue, she thought. They needed more space, more time. Ten days was too many days that the dam could break and alter everything. If possible, she would leave the tour permanently. But how would she explain it to Andrew? How would she explain it to Larry, her new boyfriend? She cared very deeply for him. She even loved him, she was certain. Even if wasn't the all consuming passion she felt for Bono. What good was emotion if it burned so deeply, so painfully?
Gloria's heart hammered as she hailed a cab and watched the city slip by. It didn't feel normal until she reached her building. She tossed a wad of cash at the driver and poured on to the sidewalk. Once again, she was disappointed to not find Bono waiting for.
Her inner sanctum offered no solace. Over a month ago, she had let him in against her better judgment. She could see him on her sofa, in her robe. She recalled him naked in her shower, in her bed. It was only one night, but her apartment felt tainted now. He had kissed her, touched her, tasted her in this space. He had lit her body on fire and smothered her skin with kisses to cool it down.
Gloria tossed her wool coat over the back of a chair. Maybe it was time to redecorate. Perhaps a renovation? Or a new place? Somewhere that old and current loves do not haunt the furniture or every corner.
She poured herself a healthy glass of red wine and sat at her tiny breakfast nook. If she'd had the energy, she would have cried. Her eyes burned from exhaustion. Opening her laptop, she pulled up her itinerary for LA. The cursor hovered over the ‘change itinerary’ link. She couldn't leave tomorrow, but perhaps the day after. With a deep breath and $500 extra dollars, she switched her flight from ten days away to two. By the time she returned from the West Coast, Bono would be on his way to Africa. With his wife by his side where she belonged.
One problem sorted. Now, did she just leave, or did she tell him?
~~~~~~
Note: I might take some liberties with style to skip ahead to the well thought out climax. I hope you enjoy this. I'll be happy to put this as the 3rd story I've completed!
Let me know your thoughts.
<3
